francais est interessant mais tres difficile!

Francais est interessant mais tres difficile!
(French is interesting but very difficult!)

Today I had my 2nd French test, consisting of 2 sections- firstly is the written one, dictation on the numbers, den got 2 short close passages to fill in the correct verb and grammar… its pretty difficult, but thank God got some tips from zhi qing’s fren, so one of the close passages wif helping words isn’t tat scary… but come to the 2nd part, which is sort of like role play and dialogue, I really screwed it up… I worked wif zhi qing and mabel, but haiz… again I felt so unprepared… becos we cant refer to our scripts, we decided not to write out the speech, so we went thru roughly wad we wanna say, and our topic is abt wad we do during leisure… can say anything using words u haf learnt, but I juz felt I cant think fast enuff, and I juz cant impromptu come up wif complete sentences… sigh…. According to Yannick my tutor, he pointed many mistakes in my sentence and I’ve actually committed them like unconsciously… I juz felt so stupid, & I cant even recall those sentences tat I’ve said, but he heard everythg so clearly and obviously they’re silly mistakes… I’m the only one whom he pointed out so many mistakes… this really made me feel worse… whenever its my turn, always like got a long pause, becos my mind is thinking so slow, so sumtimes I juz anyhow say to fill the silence wif wadeva words tat came to my mind, but I haf brainlessly said stupid thgs w/o thinking whether its grammatically correct or not… we haf a rough plan wad to say, but I juz cant recall wad am I to say then… I wasn’t nervous or scared, but juz dunno my mind is juz like blank! Seems like I’m experiencing ‘mental retardation’… my mind is processing things much slower than in the past, although last time ever since sec 3 I’ve got frens like see wen & weiyun telling me tat my actions are slow like ah ma! Lol… and now I think its really worse… its showing signs first in my actions and now in my speech! OMG!!! Sigh… when I console myself tat wif more time I can do it better, but everytime I haf to consciously remind myself tat I dun haf all the time in the world, or even being alone to haf a clear composed mind to ponder on things…
I muz learn to train my mind to rmb thgs and work faster!!! ‘Sedentary life’, in terms of more freedom in uni has made me learn to relax more, but probably tat I’m too easy on myself tat I expect little productivity, and I can say I haf lost the ability to know wad is stress… it sounds gd to those who easily feels stress to learn how to relax and de-stress, but having made myself numb to emotions seem like a scary thing, becos prob I really dunno how to express many of them…. I hardly get angry wif pple, in fact I dun like and dunno how to be angry; I’m not expressive in my words, in showing happiness or gratitude, neither am I gd at talking… but I believe tis inner peace tat I feel, being less anxious and worrisome is becos I really learn to submit to God & trust Him to bring me thru everything, so its pointless to feel so tensed up becos u’re not in control but God! Juz relax and enjoy the moment….
right now I’m thankful tat at such relaxed pace learning French actually allows myself to learn more abt myself… lol… for now, think I’m juz too introvert until I realised I hate to talk…. I’m handicapped at maintaining a gd conversation, esp wif new frens, guys & pple older than me…. It’ll be made worse if its in another language, like dialects…
after today’s test I’ve decided tat I wont take anymore languages for GE (although its very interesting & I did haf the intention to take malay & Spanish), becos I simply dun like to talk and language class require a lot of participation and talking to practice using the language…. Tis is indeed a gd experience, at least I know wads learning language all abt….
On a lighter note, I thank God I’m not gonna be teacher…. Haha I pity teachers who always repeat things so many times and haf to speak loudly…. I haf such a soft voice tat I really dislike pple who talks too loudly, but I need to attribute tis soft voice of mine to the small vital capacity of my lungs… haha prob not enuff ‘qi’, & thus my low stamina….
Haha I’ve began crapping abit here, coming up wif my own theories…. Lol

Anw b4 I end, juz hope to wish Grace Chong a wonderful 20th birthday!!! God bless you always :)